How does Domestic Violence Effect Children?

Children get hurt when they see their parents being yelled at, pushed, or hit. They may feel confusion, stress, fear, shame, or think that they caused the problem. A third of all children who see their mothers beaten develop emotional problems. Boys who see their fathers beat their mothers are ten times more likely to be abusive in their adult intimate relationships(cycle). Also Girls tend to see that this is how a guy should treat them (Cycle). Children may exhibit emotional problems, cry excessively, or be withdrawn or shy. Children also may have a difficulty making friends or have a fear of adults. Children who are experiencing this stress may show it indifferent ways, including difficulty in sleeping, bedwetting, over-achieving, behavior problems, withdrawing, stomach aches, headaches and/or diarrhea. Children who grow up in violent homes have much higher risks of becoming drug or alcohol abusers or being involved in abusive relationships, as a batterer or a victim. Children do not have to be abused themselves in order to be impacted by violence in the home. In homes where domestic violence occurs, fear, instability, and confusion replace the love, comfort, and nurturing children need. These children live in constant fear of physical harm from the person who is supposed to care for and protect them. They may feel guilt at loving the abuser or blame themselves for causing the violence. Based on interviews with children in battered women's shelters, 85% of children had stayed twice with friends or relatives because of the violence, and 75% over the age of 15 had run away at least twice. Maria Roy, Children in the Crossfire, 1988.